An indigenous writer from The Philippines. I write about relationships, dating, polyamory, and running.

Hi! I’m John Pucay (pronounced Jaan Poo-kuhy).

I’m an indigenous person (Kankanaey-Ibaloi) from the Philippines. And I mostly write about relationships, dating, polyamory, and running. But since PSILY is closing (and 80% of my relationships articles are published there), I may focus more on other topics I’m interested in, like…

Freeing yourself from a soul-sucking job is a challenge when poverty is all you’ve ever known

You can’t “learn” to stop chasing money. It’s easy to say someone should get a career rather than a job, but it’s not that simple if you’ve only ever lived in piddling poverty.

It’s a mindset I know well: I was born and raised poor in a developing country. …

Friends, siblings, parents, partners. Relationships aren’t obligations or investments. They’re gifts.

I have a friend who I’ve been close to since high school. When I broke up with my long-term girlfriend, this friend became the closest person to me. But we don’t speak now.

It’s not like we had a fight or anything. We simply don’t go out anymore.

5 years…

A long-term couple goes on their last date.

She asked for a last date. I agreed. She had three requests.

“Can we have our last date for an entire day?” She asked.

I said we could. We’ll spend the day together, present in the moment.

“Can we act like we’re still together?” It was her second request. I…

Doctor Meetup: It’s like Tinder but for meeting doctors.

The Cardiologist’s office. I set a 9 AM appointment, the doc’s earliest office hour, and I arrive early because maybe the doc’s fresher and more accommodating then.

But other people had the same idea so I wait an hour in the queue before getting in.

3 minutes and a few…

We work to buy the privileges of youth that we missed, one job at a time

In his song, “Old AF,” Alex Aiono says it’s difficult to feel young when you’re burdened by responsibilities.

“Being young is pretty easy to forget, when you’re 16; paying mom and dad’s rent.”

I remember when I was 9 or 10 years old, a charity volunteer who visited my village…

John Pucay

Relationships, Culture, Polyamory, and Running. More stories at Twitter @JPucay or email me at

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